Hawig niya kapatid ko nung bata pa siya. 😙

Big Deal? I disagree

Okay I read an older post of mine about flashbacks. Hahahaha! I actually wrote that. I mean it's silly of me to have written something so emotional. Well,I don't really read my posts after I've published them cause it's just me writing and then I forget all about it. I didn't know how deep I could actually get when something becomes a big deal for me. It's true when something was a big deal to you, you'll just laugh it out in the future.

Anyway, I had a wonderful week. Hmm, first it's because of the results I got; my cousins are back from Saudi; spent quality time with three of my best friends and finally, he opened up. 🎊

THANK YOU LORD. I haven't been a good person most of the time, yet you never fail to ahower me with blessings.

That explains why,,

Yes, I shop and dress up especially when I go out. Typical casual but girly outfit but..

Eons ago, I was more into robots and racing cars than barbie dolls. I think the only girly thing I played with was the cooking stuff and whenever the family went back to the Philippines, I would spend almost every afternoon playing with my cousin's toys cause they were that cool to me (especially the magnets).

Every time we boarded the plane (until now), I always took a peek at the cockpit and I looked up to the Pilots because I figured they are really awesome people that could fly a big jet like that.

With regards to my course now, it had something to do at how I loved looking at the work that Daddy brought back home with all the blueprints and electrical stuff. 

Sports is my life just like Daddy. I admire him for the passion he has for basketball. Even if he was tired from work, he would always take the time off to go to the park which had a court to play. Of course he would tag Ericka and I along. We played badminton while waiting for Daddy. Swimming and table tennis, I inherited those genes from him. Throw in the eagerness to play billiards too, if that counts as a sport.

So, with all of that boyish side of mine, I've always wanted an older brother to play with and protect me. How does it feel like to have someone who stand by me and could get along well with my boyish character? It's a question that will always linger on my mind. My dad acts as an older brother especially in times of jokes. And he is the man that I started punching and hitting whenever he joked around with me. Guess that's why I tend to hit, punch or pinch guys that I'm close with. However, I bet it's still different to have an older brother. The one that would've told those kids that used bullied me in school,
"HEY YOU! BOG OFF MY SISTER!"
or something similar. The one that would've helped me with a homework. The one that I would've given me advice on my love life. You know, typical older brother. Oh well, thank God he gave me close guy friends. I mean to at least compensate for the yearning I have to have an older brother.

Not that I don't appreciate what I have now, my two sisters and younger brother because I love them with all my heart. I love them so much that if anything bad should happen to them, let it befall upon me instead. God's will, they're doing great. 

Okay, this post makes me miss DADDDDYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!

Move On

A friend named Jennie asked me,

"Mich, paano mo masasabing naka move-on ka na? as in yung 100%?"
in English, she asked how would you know you're totally over someone.

Based on my experience, you know you've moved on when you can finally be yourself in front of him, no awkwardness. It doesn't feel anything when you hear the sound of their name. You no longer turn subconsciously when you hear his voice nor does it not send butterflies in your stomach. Their presence nor absence does not even make a difference.  Should there be a bitter past, it doesn't hurt anymore. When people ask what happened, the story is just a story, no nostalgic feeling to it.
On your part, you're willing to become friends again should there be a chance. You may still care, but it is only at the surface. Most of all, you can be happy for him no matter what happens.

HAHAHAH! These are my raw words, no editing, fast typed. I mean corny and so much feels as it can be, it's never really easy getting over someone so yea, one should be proud when they've moved on. ^.^

Dear Old Friend..

Hey Jude

It's that kind of moment when out the sea of people, it's him that I recognise. I just know it. Even it was just the back of his head.

It's just that I want to dedicate this post to Jude and that I want him to know that he is one of the best things that has ever happened to me. Though we had it rough and awkward before but I'm glad that we're okay now.

GOALS MUST BE MET

The past few months has been a breeze for me, everything seemed to be at ease. Sure it never put a toll on me but I realized that I am not going after my goals.

My goals are or rather were:
-Get good grades
-Focus on the important stuff
-Love life can wait
-Put all personal matters aside
-Keep motivated
-Be positive
-Forget the year before

All of these were my long term goals and guide through college, but what happened? I was doing the exact opposite. I spent to much time pondering and paying attention to unimportant stuff. I've let my education go wary; not that I don't have feelings for him but it distracts me at the same time; personal matters does get in the way when I'm in school; motivation does not last very long and I definitely haven't let go of the matters of yesteryear.

There was definitely a price to pay. I've been getting a failing grade every term. Rarely did I get an all passing grade. There will always be this one subject that would slip out of my hands then I get all frustrated when I receive my grade at the end of the term. It's entirely my fault. Though there are other factors to put in, it is still my grade, my transcript to decide. It's still a far sight from graduating.

Therefore, I decided to pen down my new goals and objectives for the year. I want the old Michelle back. The one who was competitive in class, the one who could juggle her time efficiently. I used to be that girl back in secondary school. Where was that girl? I want to be like that again. This time I will make results speak for itself. I won't brag or tell anyone about it.

#REVENGE